Today I took the boys to the zoo. It was baby "D"'s first trip to the zoo. He seemed to enjoy being outside, the crowds, the animals, and the sunshine.
It was a pleasant few hours; free of worry and stress; no one was hungry; no one was making a mess; no one was crying; and for a moment, no one was sick. Everyone was happy.
And what a sweet moment that was.
Upon arriving home, we received a phone call.
The doctor.
Reporting on the test baby D had this week.
Not the best news.
And the worrying starts again.
But he is still at home with us.
He isn't back in the hospital yet.
And we will pray he stays home with us for a long long time -free of hospital trips and doctor visits.
But I worry.
I worry for him- for his health, his well-being, for my other children, for my husband who works in a dangerous job to provide for us.
And I worry for others.
I worry about my sister's children who have the swine flu.
I worry about family members-their health, safety, and happiness and futures.
I worry that I haven't been the kind of friend to others that I would like to be.
I worry that I am not being the best mother I can be-that sometimes my kids watch too much T.V.
I worry that I am going to be "f-a-t" forever even though I work at it trying to lose the baby weight.
I worry that I am not reaching my full-potential spiritually.
I worry for the future.
And I wonder, what good does all this worrying do? I need to be strong and not let worries empty me of my strength.
My baby is still going to be sick and most likely will end up in the hospital again. I need to be strong for him.
I believe my husband is going to be protected, I pray for it everyday.
I can't stop the swine flu...but I can wash my hands like crazy and pray that the nieces and nephews who have it will get better. And they will.
I can try to be a better friend by serving others when I am able to and being appreciative of those who serve me.
I can let my children know I love them, by savoring the moments I have with them while they are little and still like me and like being home. I can turn off the t.v. and read to them more.
I can exercise, and eat better, and remember that this too shall pass, and someday I'll get my body back :)
I can pray. I can ponder. I can read the scriptures.
I can remember that "worrying doesn't empty today of its troubles, it empties tomorrow of its strength."
And most importantly, I can remember always that God is in charge. Trust in Him, and let your heart not be troubled. ☻.
I used to have a worry problem. I would let myself worry for x number of minutes in the morning. If I caught myself I'd say you dealt with that the best you could this morning and your missing the moment of your life for nothing but a worry you can't change.
ReplyDeleteI hope that you are able to get out of your worry funk, it can really steal the vitality from you
Sorry for all your worries. I wish I could take them away.
ReplyDeleteAmen!
ReplyDeleteI certainly could use your advice.
Hoping all will be well with the baby.
You will be in my prayers!
ReplyDeleteI love how you ended your post with faith. Faith the Heavenly Father will take care of us. Especially when we are doing all that we can and some days we can only muster a little, but you know, I think it's okay and he still blesses us and even carries us at the low points. I love the gospel and want to thank you for sharing your testimony and faith with us. Hugs to you and your family!!!
ReplyDeleteAh, needed to read this this morning. Thank you, Sharla!!
ReplyDeleteYour New little guy looks wonderful, You are so very blessed to have the medical services you do. We all worry and with the Help of our Heavenly Father we will make it through. Bless you and your special family.
ReplyDeleteLove the post. My mom is really big on not worrying about things because then you "live through" all these bad things that you will probably never actually live through. So, great reminder!
ReplyDeleteHope things are going good. I would love to come and visit sometime and let the boys play if you want us to! Also, it has been awhile since we went to the zoo so we will go again any time you want to! let me know
You've got a lot on your plate right now, but I think you're on the right track. Work to fix what you can control and lean on Heavenly Father for the rest. You're in my prayers, I only wish I could do more...Email me your digits and I'll give you a call.
ReplyDelete